Friday, March 25, 2011

The Signs of the Times

Things have been busy over here at the Nut House. I won't bore you with my excuses, but I have fallen horribly behind on all of my chores. I have been having a hard time catching up, because everything is such a mess that I am a bit overwhelmed. In the past, I would have sucked it up, picked one thing to do, done it, and before long, I would be on my way to a clean house (which I understand is relative). But that was before blogging when I knew any better. Now, instead of actually doing something about the filth, I will just blog about it. Blogging is much more fun anyways.

The Signs of the "It's Time To Clean Your House"

1. The bowl of milk left over from cereal on your countertop looks like sour cream-and you are considering covering it with saran wrap, putting it in the refrigerator to use it as such just so you don't have to clean the bowl just yet.

2. The other dishes on your countertop are just slightly cemented down and need a little prying to get lose.

3. You are considering putting a for sale sign outside that says "For Sale-As Is" and just moving.

4. The ground outside is cleaner than your floors inside.

5. You have way more dirty clothes than you do clean clothes.

6. Because of #5, you are thinking about just buying new clothes and throwing away the dirty ones.

7. Also, because of #5, you are beginning to believe that clothes multiply while in the dirty hamper.

8. You are thinking about serving frozen pizza on paper plates for quite a while in the near future for every meal. See #1 & #2.

9. Actually, because of #1 & #2 you are beginning to think that eating is highly overrated.

10. Even when your kids pick up their stuff and do all their chores, your house still looks a wreck, because if you were to be honest most of the junk is yours.

11. Your yard is more weeds than it is grass.

I have to ask though, who decides what are weeds anyways? Our weeds happen to have quite some pretty flowers growing out of them. Why do people think that some flowers aren't good enough to be considered flowers? I think that is mighty rude. Besides, my kids pick me "flowers" all the time that I proudly display in my kitchen. Plus, God made these flowers so I think we should just go with the more natural look anyways. That means I don't have to mow. Oh, what is that you say? I don't mow? Oh yeah, you're right. Well, the Other Nut wouldn't have to then. I am totally sure that our neighbors would go for the natural look. I bet right now they are discussing the beauty of our yard as I type.

12. You have to sweep at least 2 times to get your floors somewhat clean before you can even mop them.

13. After typing #12, you realize that you don't even have a normal big mop.

14. Your house has developed what you could call a slight odor, and you are learning to like it. Either that or your nose hairs are singed from the odor.

15. You are still blogging, because you are in denial of the fact that you really need to get up and be productive. And your house scares you right now. You never know what you might find.

If you know my phone number, please call me and tell me to get off my bum and get to work!
Just don't be mad if I hang up. :)


pinkcombatboots said...'ve got the housecleaning blues. I'm with you 100%! I'd rather blog than clean. :) Hmmm, what you wrote sounds oddly like my kitchen right now...

"Ima" said...

The blues is a good way to describe it, but I finally got my kitchen clean. I'm thinking about not letting anyone eat anymore. :)

hann said...

You can contact any renovators, my cousin changed the counter top of his kitchen through kitchen countertops.

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